where the hell is that patience ive been looking for?

so it's been a year since i started playing poker, in that time i believe ive gone from a HORRIBLE player that would give t-rex a run, to a mediocre player with a few issues, one those being my patience, ever just had to grind for 6 blind levels, throwing away "playable" hands because you know that if your gonna get your chips back you need a solid hand at least, thats what happened today, after 4 hands i basically had to fold every hand for 5 blind levels and the greater part of another, during this time i threw away jack ten suited 8 times because i knew i wouldn't get to limp, and then we get to the final table, and i revert back to the no patience any ace player i always was, WTF happened? i was calling and making moves i never would earlier, why would i do that? i was two away from the points, which i needed, and i took shots i didnt need to, WHY where does the patience go?

Interesting position here

I am now at a point where im starting to apply certain strategies in my game, ive learned the math as best i can, not great at mental math and i will never be caught dead with a chart, so that just means practice practice practice, until pot odds are as easy as 2 plus 2, now the only thing left to fix really is acting right, ive developed an ok reading ability, it's not the greatest but at least im not totally blind every hand i play, but thats another practice thing, but I REALLY NEED TO STOP BEING A MORON AND LET MY GOOD HANDS GO!

Heres an example thats happened to me twice because i was attached to my hands, im sitting on pocket kings, someone raises to 4 times the big blind, so i triple there bet, someone else calls my raise so original raiser bets an obscene amount to keep there good hand from being cracked and take the hand down now, i call the obscene pre-flop raise, knowing full well the person has aces or bull shit, most likely aces, but bull shit is possible, (it is bar poker) now flop comes, aces goes all in, and i have at least half my stack in, so i call with only kings, he shows aces, im fucked, and it's all because i wouldn't let go of a good hand, this and boredom are pretty much the two chinks in my game that completely destroy me, so if anyone who has played with me knows another fatal flaw in my game and would like to share it, please do, advice is greatly appreciated, (note i know i have 2 subscribers and this is basically me just rambling on to myself

goal is impossible this year

unfortunately my goal was not reached, the entire time i would reach a final table would be because i made on really good move in a tournament, then lose all my chips because i was to passive... or way to aggressive, and theres more than one tournament where i lost purely because i went on tilt or got bored and started trying to outplay people. However things are looking up, i placed first overall for the saturday tournament at McCanns and im getting help from a lot of people, I know a fare amount of them only pass on the knowledge so i won't suck out on them anymore, but hey a reasons a reason and ill take any help i can get.

anyway this a thank for the record proving that i was once a donkey, still am, but im changing it

Thank you again,
Turrets, everyones least favorite donkey

Change is happening, slowly but it's coming

so today was fun, i played semi slow and tight today and got respect on alot of raises, overall my plan to change the persona of me as a calling station is still an issue but hey, it took months to build that rep, and it will take months to get rid of it, now all i have to do is work on not getting frustrated and not trying to buy as many pots, it will come but hey, it will take awhile

Introduction/ rambling list of things that need to change

Hello everyone who may read this one day, my name in is steve, or turrets if you meet me at Mccann's in St. Cloud.

Let me start this off by declaring an idea of what this blog is going to be about, it's going to be about my journey from being the local free chip stack to being a moderately good player by the end of the summer, my way of measuring this is going to be that I want to outright win 5 tournaments at Mccann's before my 21st birthday, now not accounting for holidays and general lack of information, this gives me around 40 tries between now and then, and let me clarify, when i say win, I mean first place, not second or third

Well now that we have goal lets examine the obstacles to this goal

#1. Reputation as a loose donkeyish player
I have been known to call with horrible hands and chase cards to the river, along with over betting middle pairs and outright bluffing ridiculous amounts just to buy a little more
than 6 blinds, this has caused players to call my raises with less than their normal
standards of call worthy cards, decreasing my winning percentage on such hands
#2. The Idiot Impulse
Unlike other players who play at the same bar i do on Fridays, I generally under think
my hands and don't explore the possibility of what my opponent could have and i rarely
give any credit to a newer player to the weekly game when i should be doing the opposite,
this along with my notorius ability to suck out in do or die situations has created automatic
responses that can only be described as idiotic that generally always are the reason i lose
#3. General inexperience
Now this one is fairly straightforward, I have not played poker long enough to have a feel
reading another player and making an accurate educated guess about their hand, this one
unfortunately is purely an experience thing and will fix itself over time hopefully